Donnie Jalapeno Reigns Supreme! And spunkybean and The Bachelor Recaps

10420130_886021651420367_2669192316384554899_nWhen I leave this world, if there isn’t a patron Saint of Salsa, I hope I’ll be canonized in that category. Why? Because my Donnie Jalapeno salsa is that good. Since about October, I’ve been hammered with requests for it, and since my salsa makes the world a better place (hence my push for Sainthood), how’s that song go???  This little light of mine? I’m gonna let it shine. Hide it under a bushel? No! I’m going to let it shine. Let it shine. Let it shine. Let it shine.

“It” = salsa

I think I need to bring in Scott and Weldon to tell me if my worst-ever-business-model has any sustainability, but for now, I’m going to keep with how I do my salsa business.

  1. I post to Facebook, Twitter, and social media (and email my Donnie Jalapeno email list) that I’m making salsa on Thursday.
  2. Make salsa on Thursday in my kitchen.
  3. Have people come to my house on Friday and Saturday and pick up their salsa.

I don’t think you need an M.B.A. to recognize the flaw – limited distribution capability. The problem is, I know my salsa is the best but only when fresh (seriously …read the reviews).

Some food expert once said to add a preservative, and it changed the flavor. Someone else said “can it” and that worked, OK, but even then only has a limited shelf life.

That’s my challenge for 2018 …how to increase output without sacrificing the freshness that makes it the best salsa in the world.

What else? Oh, yes. The Bachelor is back!!! And so are my recaps at spunkybean. You can get started before Monday’s premiere by reading my quick analysis of all the women who’ll be chasing Arie.

Now, here’s that song about letting my light shine.

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Things I Did: Weekend Writing Wrap-Up

There was a point in my life where I’d have thought a blog entry like this was superfluous, unnecessary, and excessive (just like the two words I used after “superfluous”). I’d have also thought a blog entry like the one you’re about to read (or not read) is an exercise in arrogance. The great thing about getting older is you wise up and realize, who cares, and before long I’m going to be standing in a restaurant yelling at people about why rap music is what’s wrong with America and kids these days (that actually happened at a radio station event I went to this week).

Without further ado, here’s some stuff I wrote this week that’s available for public consumption (and I only wish I could share with you a script I’m writing, but …I can’t …yet). I hope you’ve bookmarked this blog or that you follow me on Twitter at @donkowalewski, or that you look at spunkybean every now and then. But just in case you have a busy life and it doesn’t revolve around me, here’s my weekly digest.

The Bachelor Juan Pablo, Sharleen Quits: As someone commented on Facebook …”weel you assep’ diss rose?” I really hope the women of America are paying attention to what an international heart throb looks like after a few weeks.

American Idol Rush Week Top-15 Girls Perform: Malaya! Malaya! Malaya! Can this awesomely cool nerd win over all of America’s hearts? Can her ridiculously amazing voice trump the pretty faces of a few other ladies? I’m not kidding you. I’ll vote for multiple times every week.

American Idol Rush Week Top-15 Boys Perform: At first glance, it doesn’t seem like there’s an Idol-worthy male performer, but it’s soooooo early. We have no idea who’s about to unleash a torrent of talent on our televisions. I love the quirky Alex Preston, but he lacks mainstream appeal. It would seem one of the Country boys should be the odds on favorite, but they lack a certain boyish charm.

American Idol Rush Week Results (Top-13 Revealed): American Idol and Fox gave us one of the most disjointed hours of television I’ve ever witnessed, and even though at the end of the show I was happy with just about everyone in the Top-13, somehow during the selection and reveal process, I felt anxious and angry and like my favorite show was being torn apart at the seams. Too much estrogen in my diet, obviously.

Things I Do: Persist – And finally, I’m linking back to a little something I wrote here on this blog (it was a slow week). But I read about persistence and someone at work posted a cool graphic about persistence and it all seemed like something worth sharing. It seemed like something worth examining further, or at least a topic worth pointing out. Sure, I’m in sales and it’s what I do for a living. It’s how I feel my family. Type of sales comes in a variety of forms, and I’m currently back to a more cold-call type selling (at least if I want to long-term, sustained existence). I had a nice 12-year run as a more transaction-type, inside seller. Though I’m not really thinking about my sales, as much as I’m thinking about all of us and everything we do in life. The very existence of this blog should tell you “Don wants to be a writer.” So after almost 7 or 8 years of blogging, having ghost-written two books, launched a pop-culture website, and now working on a script, I guess you could say, though I’m not throwing my entire existence into the endeavor, I’m writing …and it makes me happy. Would I love to be J.K. Rowling and appearing on Oprah? Sure, but that would be the happy accident of it all. I mean that. And who knows …maybe that will happen one day and when it does I’ll just say the secret to my success was persistence.

Now, I wrote so much (this was meant to be very brief), my coffee got cold. See you when next I blog about something.

Things I Did: Signed a Ghost-Writing Client

When I’m not writing about American Idol, The Bachelor and Bachelorette, and Survivor over at spunkybean, I write some other stuff. Once I wrote a concert-guide for Coachella. You can still buy it if you want to see how accurately I predicted the success and failure of certain bands.

I once wrote a short diet book, but the author never used it.

I’ve written articles about talking to people in the afterlife, on mobile phone usage in third world nations, and “green living” in Manhattan.

This “ghost-writing” thing is something I stumbled upon and I love it. If you have a blog and need entries, if you’d like to write something for a magazine and your article needs a little spit shine, or if you have an idea for a book but are intimidated by the process of writing it, organizing it, and getting the story out of your brain and onto paper …call me.

Last week I talked to a gentleman with an amazing, heartbreaking, and incomprehensible story that he felt needed to be told. He’d hammered out various details and long sections, but wasn’t sure what to do with it. I know exactly what he should do. He agreed with my concept and story structure, and yesterday he hired me to write it for him.

I hope someday I’ll be able to brag about this project and tell you the title and plot, but sometimes ghost writers just can’t tell anyone what’s up. But I’ll say this …if I can capture his voice, pain, and the turmoil involved, this will be an amazing book. I’m thrilled to be a part of something like this.

Now, if you need me at any time during the next 120-days, I’ll be at my writing desk toiling away. And occasionally I’ll be on Twitter procrastinating at @donkowalewski.